I'm jealous of people with German cars... but at least I have mustard.

I live in Cuba now, the shore is a maze of warm , oiled beech staircases. I'm at peace.

The sky is amber.

The only thing every single human being has in common is that they all hate being alive.

The first floor of Wartenweiler library (on campus) contains a labyrinthine bath house decorated entirely in an unpleasant shade of salmon pink.

Professor on podium: Now, we all know why we're here at this academic conference. It's not to share knowledge or impart wisdom -- it's to do one thing: get laid.